[Ring, ring, Mr. Deus Ex Machina]
[Short pause] Yeah, I'm fine. What's up?
Nothing much. Just... Felt like calling.
[Wincing to himself on the other side of the phone]
[Wincing to himself on the other side of the phone]
Yeah?
[He sounds confused, but not suspicious]
Well...okay. Uh, I'm not doin' anything right now, except working on a golem.
[He sounds confused, but not suspicious]
Well...okay. Uh, I'm not doin' anything right now, except working on a golem.
You make golems? I didn't know that. Sounds cool.
Yeah, it is. I'm not just a demon weapon. I'm an alchemist, too. And I pretty much invented the whole art.
You're a scientist or whatever, right?
You're a scientist or whatever, right?
Yeah, I am. So I guess I owe you guys a lot for creating scientific thought and all. Did you ever manage to make lead turn into gold or did you just stick with boulder-people?
Yeah, that's my fuckin' hobby. Turnin' lead into gold.
Why'd you really call me?
Why'd you really call me?
[Long pause, he takes a deep breath loudly enough for Giriko to hear.] I need a favor...
[Yeah, there's a surprise. Giriko snorts with amusement] You need me to go to your birthday party or somethin'?
If I'd had one, you would have been invited, but no. That's... Not exactly what I need.
It, uh. It involves Kid.
It, uh. It involves Kid.
Oh for fuck's sake.
What about him?
What about him?
[A beat, complete with a slight sniffle that may or may not have been supposed to be heard.]
You're going to say 'no' anyway, so I guess I really shouldn't waste your time...
You're going to say 'no' anyway, so I guess I really shouldn't waste your time...
Yeah, I probably will. But go ahead, it ain't a big deal for you to at least tell me.
You actually care enough to listen at least... Th-thank you. [Okay, so Birkin's laying it on thick, but he figures that's only going to help.]
I was hoping you could help me get him back. I-it would just make my life so much easier if- Oh, but I'm sure you don't want to hear my problems...
I was hoping you could help me get him back. I-it would just make my life so much easier if- Oh, but I'm sure you don't want to hear my problems...
[Giriko's not really sure what to make of this, but he's listening. He groans a little at Birkin's next words, though]
Are you fuckin... why do you even care about that? Do you know what'd happen if I tried to take Kid from Noah? He'd fuckin' kill me, that's what. Why would I do that?
Are you fuckin... why do you even care about that? Do you know what'd happen if I tried to take Kid from Noah? He'd fuckin' kill me, that's what. Why would I do that?
I don't care, not really... Everyone just thinks I'm responsible for it. He was taken right after I showed up, after all. And I'm friends with you. It doesn't look good on me. Even Stein's starting to believe I had a hand in Kid's disappearance. And I-I'm just... Really scared someone's going to really try and hurt me... [Slight sob, he doesn't want to overdo it yet. Though at least Giriko hasn't hung up on him, that's probably a good sign.]
B-but it's unfair for me to ask you to risk your life for mine, isn't it? I'm sorry, I really shouldn't have called in the first place. I'm just being selfish, I guess.
B-but it's unfair for me to ask you to risk your life for mine, isn't it? I'm sorry, I really shouldn't have called in the first place. I'm just being selfish, I guess.
[Giriko scowls] If your stupid boyfriend is so much of a fuckin' idiot, then tell him to fuck off. You have other places to go, back to your own world. Or fuck, come here. I don't give a shit.
[He grimaces] Look, what do ya want me to do? Stein already asked me to rescue Kid. He put you up to this, didn't he?
[He grimaces] Look, what do ya want me to do? Stein already asked me to rescue Kid. He put you up to this, didn't he?
[Birkin mouths "fuck" a few times for good measure. Ugh why didn't Stein just get him to do this originally? ...And then he gets back to work.]
...I didn't even know the two of you talked... What the hell else have you both talked about?!
...I didn't even know the two of you talked... What the hell else have you both talked about?!
[Okay, that surprises Giriko and he pauses for a moment in confusion. He thought he'd figured it all out - Stein puts Birkin up to all of this, making Birkin try to pretend to be his friend, making nice at the Christmas party, the whole thing. Then he tries to get Giriko to risk his life for his new friends.
But that's apparently not the situation, and now Giriko's confused again.]
Nothin'. Fuck, we've barely ever talked to each other.
But that's apparently not the situation, and now Giriko's confused again.]
Nothin'. Fuck, we've barely ever talked to each other.
Don't lie to me! [He winces at how loud his voice got that time and he can't help but wonder if anyone else can hear him and is wondering what in the blue hell he's doing. Birkin clears his throat softly, letting out a shuddering breath.] I'm sorry, I'm really not meaning to take this out on you...
I just... I just want Kid to get back home so maybe then people will shut up about what a horrible person they think I am. And maybe they're right, but... I, I don't know.
I just... I just want Kid to get back home so maybe then people will shut up about what a horrible person they think I am. And maybe they're right, but... I, I don't know.
[Giriko scowls as Birkin snaps into the phone, but relaxes a little when Birkin begins to apologize]
Look. [He pauses, scratching the back of his neck] Even if I cared that much about your problems, it's not so simple. I can't just pick him up and bring him back to you. Noah isn't gonna let him go easy, and then what am I supposed to do? I got nowhere else to go.
Look. [He pauses, scratching the back of his neck] Even if I cared that much about your problems, it's not so simple. I can't just pick him up and bring him back to you. Noah isn't gonna let him go easy, and then what am I supposed to do? I got nowhere else to go.
[Birkin keeps himself quiet for a long time, hopefully sounding like he was thinking and not like he was about ready to scream with joy.]
You... You could come here?
You... You could come here?
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